An important lesson I have been learning...
God does not solely demonstrate his love to us by only answering our prayers with a "Yes."
But rather, His love is much more confirmed to us as He SUSTAINS us through the process.
In my one of my earlier posts, I mentioned I have a lot of family and friends waiting on some answers to prayers. It hasn't made me doubt God, but it has made me question why He seems to answer the prayers of some believers over others.
I'm reading this great book entitled, "Get Off Your Knees and Pray" by Sheila Walsh and studying Ephesians in my quiet time.
I realize that God's ways are higher than our own and that God CANNOT act outside of love because He IS love. I know this but sometimes I just need that reminder from the Word. Times can be confusing and our perspective can be skewed in our pain and doubt.
I love how Sheila Walsh puts it:
"If the whole point of our lives is to become more like Christ and be a conduit for the love of God, then we will be given different paths to take-which may or may not correlate to our prayers. Some paths seem more attractive than others, but no one really knows the burden another carries. What I am convinced of is that God loves his children. I don't know why he answers one woman's prayers one way and another woman's prayers differently, only that he has a reason for it.
A quote from Gore Vidal: "Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies."
One of the ways we can measure whether we are at peace in the love of God is by asking ourselves whether we fall into Gore Vidal's camp (unable to celebrate Christ shining through another's life) or whether we are able to recognize God's wisdom as he lovingly hand-packs each [jar of clay] himself. Because only when we can do that...when we can accept his hand working differently in your life as opposed to mine, answering each prayer in his own time and understanding...can we truly be at peace with God."
Wow. This really humbled me. So many times I get caught in thinking it is all about me or you. "Why don't you heal her God? Why don't you give her a baby?" I mean I am not asking for things that are selfish (babies & healing are all good things) but then I realize it is my PERSPECTIVE that is selfish. I am here for God's purpose and whatever path he has me on is for his glory. Do I always understand that? No.
But that is where God comes in as my sustainer. He is far more interested in showing us his love by being WITH us. I find great hope in that and suddenly the big open ended questions of "Why God?" suddenly don't seem as important. It's not easy and I'm not one to shy away from things when they don't make sense but I have to trust in who God says He is. That has to be enough.
And I'm realizing it is.
"I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe.." Ephesians 1:18-19
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Advent Conspiracy
Every year at Christmas, Imago Dei puts on Advent Conspiracy...a re-prioritizing of Christmas that encourages people to get away from the worship of consumerism to the worship of Christ. Instead of spending a lot of money on gifts that people don't really want or need, it is a worship event (NOT fundraiser) that is designed to give to those that need help the most. Likewise, it forces us to detach ourselves from the material element of our society and re-attach ourselves to God and other people.
It clarifies WHOM and HOW we worship.
The important thing to realize is that Advent Conspiracy isn't asking people NOT to buy gifts. To quote from today's bulletin:
"How often have you spent money on Christmas presents for no other reason than obligation? How many times have you received a gift out of that same obligation? Thanks, but no thanks, right? We're asking people to consider spending less this Christmas (maybe buying one less gift). Sounds insignificant, yet many who have taken this small sacrifice have experienced something nothing less than a miracle: They have been more available to celebrate Christ during the advent season.
God's gift to us was a relationship built on love. So it's no wonder why we're drawn to the idea that Christmas should be a time to love our friends and family in the most memorable ways possible. Time is the real gift Christmas offers us, and no matter how hard we look, it can't be found at the mall. Time to make a gift that turns into the next family heirloom. Time to write Mom a letter. Time to take the kids sledding. Time to bake really good cookies and sing really bad Christmas carols. Time to make love visible through relational giving. Sounds a lot better than getting a sweater two sizes too big, right?"
Through last year's giving during Advent Conspiracy, the church was able to SOLVE the water crisis at Mt. Barclay in Liberia and provide clean water, a school for children and implement the teaching of sustainable skills so that single moms would no longer have to resort to prostitution. This is amazing to me!!!!!
Along with global outreach, this year Imago is extending their hand to churches in Portland with the prayer that together we can make a huge impact on one of the darkest cities in the United States....here. It is my prayer that you take a few minutes out of your day and visit the Advant Conspiracy website and pray and ask if this is something God is leading you to become part of. Please make sure to watch the video on the opening page as well as the ones shot in Liberia (under 'videos').
They aren't going to know us as Christians just based on things we choose not to do, but rather and more importantly, how we give and love other people.
Blessings.
http://www.adventconspiracy.org/
It clarifies WHOM and HOW we worship.
The important thing to realize is that Advent Conspiracy isn't asking people NOT to buy gifts. To quote from today's bulletin:
"How often have you spent money on Christmas presents for no other reason than obligation? How many times have you received a gift out of that same obligation? Thanks, but no thanks, right? We're asking people to consider spending less this Christmas (maybe buying one less gift). Sounds insignificant, yet many who have taken this small sacrifice have experienced something nothing less than a miracle: They have been more available to celebrate Christ during the advent season.
God's gift to us was a relationship built on love. So it's no wonder why we're drawn to the idea that Christmas should be a time to love our friends and family in the most memorable ways possible. Time is the real gift Christmas offers us, and no matter how hard we look, it can't be found at the mall. Time to make a gift that turns into the next family heirloom. Time to write Mom a letter. Time to take the kids sledding. Time to bake really good cookies and sing really bad Christmas carols. Time to make love visible through relational giving. Sounds a lot better than getting a sweater two sizes too big, right?"
Through last year's giving during Advent Conspiracy, the church was able to SOLVE the water crisis at Mt. Barclay in Liberia and provide clean water, a school for children and implement the teaching of sustainable skills so that single moms would no longer have to resort to prostitution. This is amazing to me!!!!!
Along with global outreach, this year Imago is extending their hand to churches in Portland with the prayer that together we can make a huge impact on one of the darkest cities in the United States....here. It is my prayer that you take a few minutes out of your day and visit the Advant Conspiracy website and pray and ask if this is something God is leading you to become part of. Please make sure to watch the video on the opening page as well as the ones shot in Liberia (under 'videos').
They aren't going to know us as Christians just based on things we choose not to do, but rather and more importantly, how we give and love other people.
Blessings.
http://www.adventconspiracy.org/
Sunday, September 28, 2008
The Body
"When Moses' hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up-one on one side, one on the other-so that his hands remained STEADY till sunset." Exodus 17:12
The beauty of this verse caught me off guard a couple of weeks ago.
I have so many dear friends and family members that are currently undergoing trying times in their life. From sickness to negative pregnancy tests I realize just how tired they must be. It's not that their faith is fading... but I know their hands must be shaking with exhaustion as they keep reaching out in faith month after month.
I imagine Moses trying to sit there with the weight of a victory on his shoulders.
10 minutes pass, then hours.
His arms, reaching up to heaven, must have started to shake as his strength was no match for the crushing pressure of this monumental task. His shoulders must have ached with exhaustion. I wonder if he started to cry out or if sweat started dripping down his face. Suddenly, this command of demonstrated faithfulness must have felt like a burden too large for him to carry.
God could have just said, "Moses, I hear your cries. I understand this is a lot for any person to carry so I will now take it from you." He could have relieved him of the stress in a blink of an eye.
Instead, God had a different plan. Just as Moses’ arms were about to drop, a brother and friend came alongside him and held him steady till sunset. When I first thought about this verse, I thought ‘how cool is that! They just held up his hands so it was easy for Moses.’ But the more I think about it out, I realize that their arms must have felt the same tiring ache to an extent. Aaron and Hur shared in that burden, in his pain and they didn’t abandon Moses when it became inconvenient. Hours passed and as the darkness of twilight started to overcome them, these three men were silhouetted against a sunset in a beautiful picture of love, faith and committed friendship.
Sometimes, there are burdens that God gives us that we can’t bear on our own. We need our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ to come alongside and help keep us steady when our arms start to shake. I love that God designed the church for this purpose. It doesn’t matter what congregation we attend or if we live in the suburbs or the inner city. We are one body in Christ. An ever moving, diverse body of believers that is called to a single purpose.
I just want to say to all my friends and family that are going through trying times that I am there for you. That I will come along side you and weep with you if you need someone to share in your pain. I will be there if you need a smile or just someone to sit in silence with you. I will be there until the sun goes down and together we shall keep each other steady.
The beauty of this verse caught me off guard a couple of weeks ago.
I have so many dear friends and family members that are currently undergoing trying times in their life. From sickness to negative pregnancy tests I realize just how tired they must be. It's not that their faith is fading... but I know their hands must be shaking with exhaustion as they keep reaching out in faith month after month.
I imagine Moses trying to sit there with the weight of a victory on his shoulders.
10 minutes pass, then hours.
His arms, reaching up to heaven, must have started to shake as his strength was no match for the crushing pressure of this monumental task. His shoulders must have ached with exhaustion. I wonder if he started to cry out or if sweat started dripping down his face. Suddenly, this command of demonstrated faithfulness must have felt like a burden too large for him to carry.
God could have just said, "Moses, I hear your cries. I understand this is a lot for any person to carry so I will now take it from you." He could have relieved him of the stress in a blink of an eye.
Instead, God had a different plan. Just as Moses’ arms were about to drop, a brother and friend came alongside him and held him steady till sunset. When I first thought about this verse, I thought ‘how cool is that! They just held up his hands so it was easy for Moses.’ But the more I think about it out, I realize that their arms must have felt the same tiring ache to an extent. Aaron and Hur shared in that burden, in his pain and they didn’t abandon Moses when it became inconvenient. Hours passed and as the darkness of twilight started to overcome them, these three men were silhouetted against a sunset in a beautiful picture of love, faith and committed friendship.
Sometimes, there are burdens that God gives us that we can’t bear on our own. We need our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ to come alongside and help keep us steady when our arms start to shake. I love that God designed the church for this purpose. It doesn’t matter what congregation we attend or if we live in the suburbs or the inner city. We are one body in Christ. An ever moving, diverse body of believers that is called to a single purpose.
I just want to say to all my friends and family that are going through trying times that I am there for you. That I will come along side you and weep with you if you need someone to share in your pain. I will be there if you need a smile or just someone to sit in silence with you. I will be there until the sun goes down and together we shall keep each other steady.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Simply Flipping the Equation...
So....I'm sorry this post is so late. I meant to write it as an immediate follow up to "Crying Out" but as usual, my good intentions always seem to find an escape route.
Since that post I have had a ton of very sweet friends and family either call, email and text and ask if Jared and I were alright.
Yes, Jared and I are okay. In fact, we are better than ever.
I feel like this is the culmination of a two year long journey and am finally at a point where I am ready to brutally honest with myself and with God. If you been keeping up with my blogs (okay, the whole three of them!) lately, I've been so tired of my Christianity being so self-focused. Aren't I made for something else? To be part of a community that reaches out as the loving hands and feet of Jesus Christ in a very practical way? I don't say this as someone else who thinks of them self as better than other Christians, but as someone who has been ignoring the call of the Lord for my own life.
Until now.
There's no more excuses, no more laziness. I want to break fee of this bubble of familiar, self-security to explore just how the Gospel can transform lives and communities here in Portland. I've received the most incredible Biblical foundation at my church but now I feel like it is time to go out and DO something with it.
At communion a couple of Sundays ago (at a church different then we normally attend), I watched as about 7 minority, inner-city high schoolers went up with their Young Life leaders to take communion as a family. Despite the troubled homes and diverse backgrounds of these kids, they circled up, with their arms around each other and partook. It was so beautiful to witness and I remember thinking, "This is what Jesus is talking about. This is a picture of what the church truly is."
I guess I'm just ready to follow and see where God takes us. It's just been so neat to dive into this with Jared. His heart is in the exact spot as mine and I love what we are exploring in our devotion time together. God is truly changing our hearts and growing me in ways that I never would have believed two years ago. I'm almost sick when I look back on my ugliness of being so incredibly judgemental and/or religious toward so much in my life. I feel like God has brought us full circle and it reminds me how God never, ever gives up on us and that there is always beautiful redemption in Jesus.
I would like to finish this blog with this little tidbit from a book entitled, "Quaker Summer" by Lisa Samson. I read it almost a year ago and while I had (again) good intentions of reviewing it for the blog, I never got around to it. I was flipping through it once again a couple of weeks ago and fell upon a passage that couldn't more exactly describe what God is doing in our lives right now.
Let me set this up for you...
Heather Curridge, seems to have everything going for her (great church, loving family, nice SUV and house on the hill) but is secretly falling apart as she realizes she is at a crossroads in her life. She finds herself spending the summer with two elderly Quaker sisters and a nun who runs a crisis center in the rough part of town. In this scene, Heather is talking with one of the Quaker sisters(Liza).
(Liza) "Certainly. So did your church encourage you all to move outward, or was it inwardly focused?
(Heather) "Mostly inward. I did much more for my church members than I did for my neighbors, if that's what you mean."
She places her hand on the doorknob. "Maybe God's simply flipping the equation."
**First of all, I cannot stress ENOUGH that I am in no way implying some underlining or attacking message against a church. I refer to this quick passage because it describes in the most simple and beautiful way what I feel like God is calling us (Jared and I) to do in OUR life.**
It just reminds me of this saying we heard a week ago at Bridgetown Ministries and I pray it stays with me for the rest of my life....
"Don't just go to church...BE the church."
"I praise you Lord for using us and allowing us to grow in a way that brings glory to YOUR name. May we never lose sight of your truth and calling in our lives. Mold us, shape us, and thank you for bestowing upon us these amazing lessons and opportunities for growth...even despite the times we try to get in way."
Amen.
Since that post I have had a ton of very sweet friends and family either call, email and text and ask if Jared and I were alright.
Yes, Jared and I are okay. In fact, we are better than ever.
I feel like this is the culmination of a two year long journey and am finally at a point where I am ready to brutally honest with myself and with God. If you been keeping up with my blogs (okay, the whole three of them!) lately, I've been so tired of my Christianity being so self-focused. Aren't I made for something else? To be part of a community that reaches out as the loving hands and feet of Jesus Christ in a very practical way? I don't say this as someone else who thinks of them self as better than other Christians, but as someone who has been ignoring the call of the Lord for my own life.
Until now.
There's no more excuses, no more laziness. I want to break fee of this bubble of familiar, self-security to explore just how the Gospel can transform lives and communities here in Portland. I've received the most incredible Biblical foundation at my church but now I feel like it is time to go out and DO something with it.
At communion a couple of Sundays ago (at a church different then we normally attend), I watched as about 7 minority, inner-city high schoolers went up with their Young Life leaders to take communion as a family. Despite the troubled homes and diverse backgrounds of these kids, they circled up, with their arms around each other and partook. It was so beautiful to witness and I remember thinking, "This is what Jesus is talking about. This is a picture of what the church truly is."
I guess I'm just ready to follow and see where God takes us. It's just been so neat to dive into this with Jared. His heart is in the exact spot as mine and I love what we are exploring in our devotion time together. God is truly changing our hearts and growing me in ways that I never would have believed two years ago. I'm almost sick when I look back on my ugliness of being so incredibly judgemental and/or religious toward so much in my life. I feel like God has brought us full circle and it reminds me how God never, ever gives up on us and that there is always beautiful redemption in Jesus.
I would like to finish this blog with this little tidbit from a book entitled, "Quaker Summer" by Lisa Samson. I read it almost a year ago and while I had (again) good intentions of reviewing it for the blog, I never got around to it. I was flipping through it once again a couple of weeks ago and fell upon a passage that couldn't more exactly describe what God is doing in our lives right now.
Let me set this up for you...
Heather Curridge, seems to have everything going for her (great church, loving family, nice SUV and house on the hill) but is secretly falling apart as she realizes she is at a crossroads in her life. She finds herself spending the summer with two elderly Quaker sisters and a nun who runs a crisis center in the rough part of town. In this scene, Heather is talking with one of the Quaker sisters(Liza).
(Liza) "Certainly. So did your church encourage you all to move outward, or was it inwardly focused?
(Heather) "Mostly inward. I did much more for my church members than I did for my neighbors, if that's what you mean."
She places her hand on the doorknob. "Maybe God's simply flipping the equation."
**First of all, I cannot stress ENOUGH that I am in no way implying some underlining or attacking message against a church. I refer to this quick passage because it describes in the most simple and beautiful way what I feel like God is calling us (Jared and I) to do in OUR life.**
It just reminds me of this saying we heard a week ago at Bridgetown Ministries and I pray it stays with me for the rest of my life....
"Don't just go to church...BE the church."
"I praise you Lord for using us and allowing us to grow in a way that brings glory to YOUR name. May we never lose sight of your truth and calling in our lives. Mold us, shape us, and thank you for bestowing upon us these amazing lessons and opportunities for growth...even despite the times we try to get in way."
Amen.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Stiamo andando in Italia!
Bring on the spaghetti, art, beautiful landscapes, and historic architecture, folks...Jared booked a wedding in Italy for next summer!!!! Can I please just tell you how humbled I am right now by this blessing? I'm so overwhelmed by the goodness of the Lord! Italy has been my dream destination ever since I took a year of History of Western Art in college. I never thought I would actually ever get to go....
The castle where the wedding will be taking place.
The nearest city to the castle. I can't remember the name of it though...
Lord, we thank you!!!
The castle where the wedding will be taking place.
The nearest city to the castle. I can't remember the name of it though...
Lord, we thank you!!!
Friday, September 5, 2008
Crying Out
I feel like my soul is bursting right now and I barely can contain it.
I want to fall to my knees and just cry out and say, "Alright God. I hear you. I feel you. And it is now time for me to stop fighting or making excuses. It's time for me to rip the blinders off of my eyes and see the path you have laid out before me."
The culmination of this past year's journey is here and I am scared, nervous, but also amazingly more alive than ever. It's time for a change in my life. A big one. It's been about two years in the making and even though I know it will be difficult and that not everyone will understand, Jared and I are about to start the most amazing faith expedition of our lives.
We are yours God, forever and ever. Amen.
I want to fall to my knees and just cry out and say, "Alright God. I hear you. I feel you. And it is now time for me to stop fighting or making excuses. It's time for me to rip the blinders off of my eyes and see the path you have laid out before me."
The culmination of this past year's journey is here and I am scared, nervous, but also amazingly more alive than ever. It's time for a change in my life. A big one. It's been about two years in the making and even though I know it will be difficult and that not everyone will understand, Jared and I are about to start the most amazing faith expedition of our lives.
We are yours God, forever and ever. Amen.
Monday, September 1, 2008
In Memory
This is my journal entry from me and Jared's hike today...
"Jared and I made the hike up to Angel's Rest today and now I'm on a boulder overlooking the Gorge. It is a perfect moment with my very best friend. I'm at complete peace and overwhelmed with just how beautiful it is up here. I'm so blessed to be surrounded by God's creation like this in a place where I live and to be able to share it with my hubby.
We were just sitting on a bench at the end of the trail, soaking up the blue of the water, the varigated green of the trees and the gray mist of the clouds when a man and a young boy cam and sat down next to us on the ground. The man whose name is Jeff, was friendly in conversation and asked if we had ever been up here to the bench before.
It was then that I saw his boquet of colorful dalias.
The bench we were sitting on had a memorial plaque attached to it for a woman by the name of Susan Hendricks. This man was her husband and the boy was her son who was only 10 days old when she died. They come up here, every year, to resand the bench and sit in memory of her.
I couldn't help but cry as I heard her husband talk about his wife and how it has been for his son who has no memory of his Mom. I was overwhelmed by their peace, their smiles and the loving touch of a dad and a son as they sanded away the carvings and weathering of another year gone by.
To me, it was such a precious moment to experience and it reminded me that admist the tragedy of this life, peace can be found in the love we share with others. The memories of people and the impact they had on our lives will never die and never will they stop being important. I know this life will change and there might be a day when Jared isn't by my side. But just as that solitary bench sits overlooking the beauty of the Gorge, I realize my memories of days like today will be a sanctuary for me to find peace and I suddenly know I will be okay.
Thank you Lord, for this day and the glimpse of love and comfort you revealed to me. It was such a gift to behold."
Jeff and Jordan at the bench's initial dedication. For more information, visit the website: www.susanlhendricksmemorials.net
Almost ten years later. They forgot their camera and asked if we wouldn't mind taking one of them. Praying God blesses your family!
A close-up of the plaque on the bench. Very touching.
My hubby and I taking in the beautiful view. I chopped off my hair and got red streaks! Kinda hard to tell in this pic but I feel like a rock star! ;)
"Jared and I made the hike up to Angel's Rest today and now I'm on a boulder overlooking the Gorge. It is a perfect moment with my very best friend. I'm at complete peace and overwhelmed with just how beautiful it is up here. I'm so blessed to be surrounded by God's creation like this in a place where I live and to be able to share it with my hubby.
We were just sitting on a bench at the end of the trail, soaking up the blue of the water, the varigated green of the trees and the gray mist of the clouds when a man and a young boy cam and sat down next to us on the ground. The man whose name is Jeff, was friendly in conversation and asked if we had ever been up here to the bench before.
It was then that I saw his boquet of colorful dalias.
The bench we were sitting on had a memorial plaque attached to it for a woman by the name of Susan Hendricks. This man was her husband and the boy was her son who was only 10 days old when she died. They come up here, every year, to resand the bench and sit in memory of her.
I couldn't help but cry as I heard her husband talk about his wife and how it has been for his son who has no memory of his Mom. I was overwhelmed by their peace, their smiles and the loving touch of a dad and a son as they sanded away the carvings and weathering of another year gone by.
To me, it was such a precious moment to experience and it reminded me that admist the tragedy of this life, peace can be found in the love we share with others. The memories of people and the impact they had on our lives will never die and never will they stop being important. I know this life will change and there might be a day when Jared isn't by my side. But just as that solitary bench sits overlooking the beauty of the Gorge, I realize my memories of days like today will be a sanctuary for me to find peace and I suddenly know I will be okay.
Thank you Lord, for this day and the glimpse of love and comfort you revealed to me. It was such a gift to behold."
Jeff and Jordan at the bench's initial dedication. For more information, visit the website: www.susanlhendricksmemorials.net
Almost ten years later. They forgot their camera and asked if we wouldn't mind taking one of them. Praying God blesses your family!
A close-up of the plaque on the bench. Very touching.
My hubby and I taking in the beautiful view. I chopped off my hair and got red streaks! Kinda hard to tell in this pic but I feel like a rock star! ;)
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